Posted by
William D. Dannenmaier on Saturday, June 25, 2011 5:13:59 PM
Sitting on the back porch, ruminating on the sorry state of our politics, I felt a strong urge for physical activity. It is all of five feet from our porch to the complete privacy of our greenery surrounded backyard, at least fifty steps to the bathroom. I decided to conserve energy, a reasonably frequent decision on my part, and simply stepped off the porch and walked a few steps to “water the daisies” so to speak.
Afterwards, thinking this through, I explained to Sheila, who doesn’t always appreciate my logic, that flushing a toilet uses at least two gallons of water. Watering the trees adds nutrients to the soil as well as moisture while conserving purified water. Spending much of my time outdoors or within a step or two of shrubbery provided privacy, I do this at least five times a day. This means I’m saving us ten gallons of water a day, 300 gallons in a thirty day month or 3650 gallons a year. I should be rewarded for this conservation of our natural resources not to mention savings on our water bill. She should raise my allowance.
Carrying the above one thoughtful step further, why isn’t this a common practice? In cities people could put a hedge of evergreen bushes about a small enclosed spot in the backyard creating “arbor potties.” Hundreds of millions of gallons of water, scarce in some regions, would be saved every year. This would not only save water, the hedges would contribute to the greening of our nation as well as providing nesting places for birds. Green Peace and other conservation groups should adopt arbor potties as a cause. It could do far more for the nation than many of the causes they already support and do less damage to wildlife than some, such as the windmills.
Needless to say, privacy will always be a concern and must be protected. Girls of all ages are always interested. A recent example of this interest involved one of our congressmen who enjoyed, or at least supported, this interest. At the other extreme, one of my daughters provided an example when she was about three. Enrolled in child care, she began bringing an empty bread sack containing wet panties to the car when I picked her up after work. The third day of this, I dropped in to ask about it, saying that I had wondered if there had been some change at the agency. They replied that no, they had wondered about problems at home. When I denied this, they watched. The next day they reported that my daughter, whom I shall not name, was watching the little boys when they went to the bathroom. She decided she could do anything a boy could do so, instead of sitting when the need arose, she simply stood in front of the toilet as the boys did. Anyway, my two examples cover from age three through maturity, is any more evidence needed? Perhaps an additional evergreen screen in front of the entrance would be wise also.
As a side note, I recommend the avoidance of bushes with thorns. For example blueberry bushes would be acceptable and provide a pleasant distraction during fruiting season if you don’t mind blue stains whereas blackberry and raspberry bushes might be frustrating, presenting prickly problems. Grape vines, however, would be excellent and also provide first glass grape juice, especially if permitted to sit for a month or two.
I realize this is a male only solution, but let us think beyond men and water. The process of purifying water requires the use of equipment. Coal, oil, natural gas, any or all of these are used in the process. When men are saving purified water, they are saving these products also. I have no idea how many millions of gallons of such resources are used in that purification processes nationally and I doubt that anyone else does. Suffice it to say that if men in general used arbor potties, the need for the supplies used to purify water would drop. So would their prices. Heating our homes and driving automobiles would be cheaper. With these savings in mind, let us consider women.
Making it possible for women, as well as men, to use our arbor potties would greatly reduce this unnecessary expenditure of our natural resources provided by flush toilets. All we need to do to accomplish this is to build a bit of a wall around our arbor potty, put a roof over it and construct a seat for the ladies. We should then refer to our arbor potty as the house out back or as the “outhouse.” What a novel idea: what a great idea!
Normally, I would hesitate to suggest anything for women. Years of experience with women, including wives and daughters, have led me to realize that expecting acceptance of a man’s intelligent, reasoned, approach to some problem by a woman is a fantasy of inexperienced youth. This idea, however, is so new and has so great a potential of saving natural resources that it should not be dismissed out of hand.